But Peach’s neck is going well and she fully recovered fro surgery. It hasn’t stopped her drunken rampages.
HEY WINNIE, WHAT’S UP?
NICE HONEYPOT. HEY DID YOU HEAR ABOUT RAIKOU? FRICKING PEACH…
SWEET JESUS MARY JOSEPH LOOK OUT WINNIE!
HOLY FUCKING SHIT PEACH!
OH MY GOD, WINNIE…. PEACH, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!
STOP TRYING TO REAP THE BENEFITS OF ANOTHER DEAD BODY.
MARIO WON’T BE ABLE TO BREAK YOU OUT OF PRISON YOU KNOW.
SOMEONE ARREST THIS BITCH.
WINNIE THE POOH IS DEAD. HOLY SHIT.
WHEN WILL THIS DRUNKEN MASSACRE END?!
To be continued…
OH HEY RAIKOU, HOW ARE YOU?
JUST HANGING OUT, BEING AWESOME? HEY IS THAT…
WAIT… PEACH… WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?
SWEET JEHOVAH’S WITNESS, YOU’VE HIT RAIKOU!
WHY ARE YOU STILL DRIVING YOU DRUNK SLUT? SOMEONE CALL AN AMBULANCE FOR CHRIST’S SAKE!
HOLY CRAP YOU JUST KILLED SOMEONE. WHAT THE HELL PEACH??
YOUR GOLD COIN DOESN’T JUSTIFY A HIT-AND-RUN.
WHERE IS YOUR SOUL PEACH? WHERE IS YOUR SOUL?
RAIKOU… NOOOOO!!!
WHEN WILL YOU EVER LEARN PEACH?
HEY PEACH. YOU CAN’T DRIVE. YOU’RE DRUNK.
HEY PEACH, GET OFF THOSE CHOPSTICKS!
NOW LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE YOU STUPID SLUT.
CHECK YOURSELF BEFORE YOU WRECK YOURSELF, PEACH!
YOU DUMB BITCH.
WHEN WILL YOU EVER LEARN PEACH?
HEY PEACH, I SEE YOU’RE ABIDING TO THE ROAD RULES. THAT’S GOOD!
OKAY PEACH, WATCH IT NOW…
HOLY SHIT PEACH!
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST PEACH!! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!
PEACH, YOU DUMB SLUT, YOU JUST RAN IN TO SOMEONE… NO DON’T KEEP GOING!
FOR HEAVENS SAKE, PEACH YOU…
“Fucking Peach, man. I was driving yesterday, and I looked in my rear-view mirror and saw this hotted-up pink convertible like, swerving all over the road. It was all sorts of fucked up, too—the front bumper was scraping on the ground, the headlights were smashed, and the driver’s side door was…
Esther:
OMW
KATE
DUDE
I FORGOT TO TELL YOU
LOLOLOL
OKay
So
you know how much of a drunk slut peach is?
so I found her this morning
in my suitcase from england
Kate:
OH MY GOD PEACH!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
Esther:
dumb slut had a big safety pin around her head/neck
Kate:
YOU ARE NOT FLYINGIN THAT STATE
Esther:
SHE WAS ALMOST DECAPITATED
Kate:
WHAT THE FUCK YOU SLUT?!
Esther:
(like seriously, I was like LOL OH NO!)
She must have crashed!!!
Swear to god , she will actually kill herself one day
Kate:
When will it stop? /shakes head
Esther:
she needs to stop drinking and driving!
F**king peach..
You know how many times she has gone to rehab?
You know how many times I have paid for her to get out of jail? *sigh*
Kate:
six for the first
Hundreds for the second
Esther:
Exactly.
100s of dollars just…. WASTED
Kate:
I dunno why we keep doing it for her. We should just let her rot there.
She’ll never learn
Esther:
Speaking of wasted… that’s what Peach was doing all weekend!
We should! We really should.
Honestly.
Kate:
Teach her a lesson.
I’m sorry I’ve left her with you for so long
Oh god Esther…what will she be like in Melbourne?
Esther:
It’s okay Kate… I’ve learnt to deal with her.
Jesus, I have no idea. Drunk Peach in the big city?
Big clubs…
It’ll be a nightmare.
No, this time she will go to rehab and she’ll stay there.
We’re driving down so she might get into some shenanigans on the way down!
Kate:
Mhm, and we best make sure Mario doesn’t go pulling her out like other times. He needs to not give in to her pleading.
Esther:
But you know, it’s Mario. He’ll always be there for her. Even if she’s a giant whore.
He needs to realise that she needs help.
She’s a giant dirty slut who needs help.
Professional help.
Last time she fooled me with her “I’m seeing a doctor… Dr. Jack Daniels…”
Never again!!
Kate:
I know right?! How dumb is he?!
- gamer girl: omgggg modern warfare 4 lyfeee<3 lolz wait how do you even do this? oh no i think i just died lol cuteee. omgg im sooo sexy cuz i play video games that boyzzz lykee lolll im like the kewlestt gurl evaarrr
- girls who play video games: GOD DAMN IT MARIO. IS IT THAT FUCKING HARD TO STAY ON RAINBOW ROAD FOR MAYBE TEN SECONDS. OH MY FUCKING GOD PEACH YOU FUCKING WHORE. YOU REALLY HAD TO USE THE THUNDER CLOUD AND FUCKING SHRINK ME. REALLY. THIRD. I'M IN THIRD PLACE OH MY GOD YES THANK JESUS LORD ABOVE IN THE HEAVENS. FUCK. NO. I FELL OFF. I SWEAR TO GOD MARIO I'M GOING TO MURDER YOUR ITALIAN PLUMBER MOTHER FUCKING ASS. i hate my life.
She’s done it again.
Another $20 out of my wallet. A plumber can only make so much money! I don’t understand… why does she do this to us? Why can’t she just ask me for money instead of take it? Surely a princess would have some sort of financial stability! Dumb slut probably spent it all on crack. I swear to god, if I get another phone call from the police…
And not to mention her car! Her car has almost been totalled about 5 times already! I swear she’s sleeping with the mechanic. It magically appears to be working again the next day. Such a slut.
Seriously cannot take this much longer.
Sincerely,
Irritated.
